what can I say?

There is a big thing going on in my life. It's not about me so although it affects me deeply, I can't really write about it. That will probably change at some point but even then, maybe not that much. It is so sad and difficult but there are tiny little bright spots. And I'm kind of busy and kind of not. I don't want to go to bed at night and when I do, I lie on my back with my thoughts racing so I shift position and they still race. Eventually I sleep and then I want to sleep in because bed in the morning is so warm and non confronting. Staring out the window is pretty appealing too. Everyday life seems to be taking a bit of a back seat. But I am making an effort, gym, work, hanging out with people, posting cat pictures on facebook, having dinner. Going to see newborn babies. That sort of thing.
Sitting in the car. As you do. Not crying but today has been shitty and sad. Again. And then there was this thing going on between parents at my daughter's school. I most probably shouldn't write about that either but we are so on the nose because we are on the wrong side of this so bugger it. It has been so ugly and nasty that I wish I hadn't weighed in but for various reasons, I did. Not badly I don't think but it sparked another wave of nasty emails. And then at a kid's birthday party one of the parents tried to talk to me about it, about why my friend was so wrong when I didn't think they were, and this parent kept going on and on even after I asked her to stop. I told her that we were thinking of other schools, which we have been for a multitude of reasons even before this nasty little episode, and she said in quite a patronising way that maybe that was a decision we had to make. It's a hard decision for lots of reasons but we shall see. We went to see another school yesterday and it gave us lots to think about. It's something I could do without at this point but even with the first thing going on, I think we need to make some decisions.


librarygirl said...

School politics! Freaking nightmare. Intensely glad my kids are out of that stage.
As to the other stuff: hoping it all works out. Life sucks sometimes, doesn't it?
If ever you feel like a visitor or going for a walk or a coffee on a Thursday or Friday, shoot me an email. Would love to see you sometime.

Stomper Girl said...

It never rains but it pours. Hope to catch up properly with you on Monday.

Leah said...

Doesn't sound like much fun - thinking of you

h+b said...

Wow janet .. that sounds completely awful :(

Felicity said...

you poor blossom! Other people can be such baboons :( I'm sorry about the other stuff too - life can throw you lots of mouldy oranges sometimes.

May I join the coffee meetup? Would love to see and Gill