there was cake

We've got a way to go before I'm completely happy with how we do mother's day around here. It's not that I want to buy into the whole commercial slippers and flowers thing, but now I'm a mother, it's like I want some recognition, some celebration of this big and essential part of my life. G says I'm not his mother so it's not up to him, but as I pointed out, I am the mother of his child, surely that's reason to get involved? Then I got in trouble for claiming my mothers day sleep in (on his day of rest) last week. So I got the days wrong, it's not like I tried to get a sleep in again this Sunday. Not that I've really had a sleep in this Saturday either, what with getting up and going into town to have a crack at some street photography featuring people we don't know, which kind of felt a bit weird. Even so, it was a whole lot easier and more fun than I imagined. But back to mother's day, we're not naturals at celebration and I don't want the day to just slip on by like any other Sunday.

Much to Grace's excitement, we baked a cake that I had an idea for last week. She helped and it all got a bit shouty when she started grabbing the softened butter with her fists and throwing flour in the air and trying to eat the sugar. Which I guess is why cooking with kids is so much fun. Maybe Grace needs playdough and I need an outdoor kitchen. Just thinking about it at the moment makes me tense but I think it's that time of the month and everything is making me tense. Much to my surprise, the cake turned out rather well. Even if I do say so myself. It's was an upside down pear and coconut cake. I was hoping Betty might come to lunch as it's the sort of cake I know she'd like. But she felt like mooching around home and I can't say I blame her. I remember that big, ready, overdue feeling with Grace. Never mind, we sent some over in a tin.

After lunch we had a little photo session, again proving how hard it is to get a group photo where someone's head doesn't looked possessed. Grace was up way past naptime, tired and zooming. Still I don't mind this one; we're talking about ears, nose, mouth, eyes and Nana's glasses. I can hardly remember life before motherhood anymore. I'm starting feel as though I've come back to being the essential me again, yet different. I see everything now through the mother lens. There's a whole lot I wanted to say about this and about learning to appreciate my own mother in new ways, even if she does irritate me sometimes (can you please stop smoking please?). And about how I have a deeper understanding of how much my mum misses her mum. But I'm tired and really should go to bed. So I will. But there was cake and lunch and we hung out together. Really, it was pretty good.

Happy mothers day :)


shula said...

A smoking mother!

Penni said...

Ah yes, we actually had quite a nice day, lunch out, a present!
Before I had kids I was always a bit scathing about mother's day being a commercial enterprise all about selling greeting cards (sorry my mum). Now I'm on the job every day I like you want a little recognition. So I grouchily told Martin he had to buy me something. He did good. It will be nice when Fred is old enough to initiate something though.
Slippers and flowers sound quite nice really.

Rachel said...

Happy Belated Mother's Day, Janet. I think you do a fantastic job with Grace and deserve some recognition. My mother smokes, too. Ugh. She stopped recently with much fanfare and then started again just prior to my wedding -due to the supposed stress. And now she's smoking like a chimney again.

Janet said...

Shula & Rachel, we call her Faggin' Nana. I know a few mums who smoke and I guess I would have if I'd had a baby in my early 30s. But sorry, yech. She keeps talking about giving up and I wish she would or at least stop pretending she will.
Penni, I agree it will be lovely when Grace can do something. My plan is to do something really nice on father's day and up the ante a bit. Heh, heh.

h&b said...

Yeah, I don't buy into the whole Mother's Day thing either - as far as i'm concerned, ever day with my son is a blessing ( will I ever want him to move home ?! )
But the husband went out and bought some lovely lillies, and gave them to the boy to give to me, which was nice.
And the boy and I made a lavender pomander with lav. from the garden for the M-I-L, coz they're into all that jazz. I like to think of it as just a regular old 'visiting present' though ;)

VictoriaE said...

I ADORE that photo of you, Grace & your mum, it says so many things.
After being a mum for about six months I suddenly realised it had got me in touch with the real me, like, the me I was before becoming a teenager and then a sulking twentythree year old!!